Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Randomize