so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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