theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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