Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize