I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize