i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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