she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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