Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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