Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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