hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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