big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize
