maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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