Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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