If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
