508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
