You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
