I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
