i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize