the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
