walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
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I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
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The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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