She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
