What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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