how can u be prego again
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
