with your own penis?
I will die if light touches me.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
