We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
