dude i'm inner monologue high
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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