Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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