we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
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I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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