How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Randomize
