I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize