I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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