More tranny stories later!
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
