mondays should just be called national damage control day
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
