Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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