with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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