Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize