What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize