Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize
