I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
