Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
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