I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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