he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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