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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day

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• (714): View more from California

  i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.

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  19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (443): View more from Maryland

  Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella

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• (805): View more from California

  I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!

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• (772): View more from Florida

  So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.

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  The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (408): View more from California

  In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals

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• (438): View more from Quebec

  I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.

  (1-438): View more from Quebec

  God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.

  (438): View more from Quebec

  Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu

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• (850): View more from Florida

  We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  *jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me

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