Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.

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  (203): he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him. http://tfl.nu/z649
  Replies (27) Good night (6572) Bad night (690)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"

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  (780): she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!" http://tfl.nu/mre5
  Replies (13) Good night (4755) Bad night (1192)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.

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  (732): a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart. http://tfl.nu/8pw6
  Replies (6) Good night (3040) Bad night (947)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad

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  (856): Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad http://tfl.nu/fp7i
  Replies (70) Good night (926) Bad night (3661)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.

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  (763): The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins. http://tfl.nu/k74l
  Replies (8) Good night (2691) Bad night (923)
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  (530): View more from California

  She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential

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  (530): She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential http://tfl.nu/2o4m
  Replies (5) Good night (3412) Bad night (688)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets

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  (630): I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets http://tfl.nu/owc7
  Replies (7) Good night (1171) Bad night (698)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?

  (1-902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.

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  (902): Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on? (1-902): I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over. http://tfl.nu/3b2m
  Replies (8) Good night (524) Bad night (875)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??

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  (304): Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun?? http://tfl.nu/lwzi
  Replies (3) Good night (955) Bad night (557)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!

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  (504): If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!! http://tfl.nu/gw9p
  Replies (2) Good night (823) Bad night (431)
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  (650): View more from California

  I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?

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  (650): I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex? http://tfl.nu/x3xg
  Replies (9) Good night (721) Bad night (288)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.

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  (202): So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end. http://tfl.nu/ej89
  Replies (1) Good night (473) Bad night (288)
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.

  (314): View more from Missouri

  What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Americans.

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  (260): The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me. (314): What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?! (260): Americans. http://tfl.nu/hz6i
  Replies (7) Good night (892) Bad night (367)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like

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  (717): Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like http://tfl.nu/ufx0
  Replies (1) Good night (351) Bad night (510)
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  (805): View more from California

  Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos

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  (805): Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos http://tfl.nu/h45n
  Replies (4) Good night (611) Bad night (362)

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