whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize