Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
