I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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