Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize
