I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Soap is not a condiment
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize