You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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