Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
