she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
