I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
